As religiões do mundo

Para quem acha que as questões religiosas são complicadas e nunca se entende sobre quem são uns e quem são os outros, e o que diz cada religião, aqui fica uma cábulazita:

Taoism: Shit happens.
Hare Krishna: Shit happens, rama, rama, ding, dong.
Hinduism: This shit happened before.
Zen: What is the sound of shit happening?
Buddhism: It is only the ilusion of shit happening.
Confucianism: Confucius say: “Shit happens”.
Islam: If shit happens, blow it up.
Judaism: Why does this shit always happen to me?
Protestantism: Shit won’t happen if I work harder.
Catholicism: If shit happens, I deserve it.
7th day adventism: Shit happens on Saturday.
Mormon: Shit happens again and again and again...
Jehovah’s witness: Knock, knock. Shit happens.
Tele-evangelism: Send us money or shit will happen to you!
Agnosticism: I don’t know if shit happens or not.
Atheism: Shit doesn’t happen.
Bushism: Shit happened. Bomb Iraq!
Jedi: Feel the shit happening you must. See not. Feeeel.
Rastafarianism: Lets smoke this shit.


(tenho uma T-shirt com isto; penso que é a forma mais prática de ofender pessoas em massa; melhor ainda que futebol!)